Um . . .

That's all I can think right now.

Um . . . neurotransmitters?
Um . . . songs that should be memorized by Wednesday for the choir concert?
Um . . . college?
Um . . . people?
Um . . . scholarships?
Um . . . technology?
Um . . . food?
Um . . . ski pass?
Um . . . clean room?
Um . . . grades?
Um . . . social life?
Um . . . residuals and linear regressions?
Um . . . DICKENS?!?!
Um . . .sleep?

All I can say right now is, 

I dunno, man,

I dunno.

Although, let me just add as a side note, that general conference did provide a few "OOOOH"s for some of these things. 

I surely hope that happened to you too.

Because being confused about life in general is sometimes slightly uncomfortable, since you end up staring at people during class, zoning out while driving, and saying nonsensical things a lot more than is hopefully normal. 

And that is why I am the way I am. 

You'll probably never understand me until I learn to understand myself. 

So, thanks for trying, but you can give up now.

Time:

Evasive.
Cunning.
Fleeting.
Elusive.
False.
Deceptive.
Crafty.
Obscure.
Transient.
Fugitive.
Unstable.
Fugacious.
Ephemeral.
Slippery.

Stop playing hard-to-get, like a conceited college guy, or a perfectly fitting swimsuit.

One of these days...

...I WILL learn to manage this!

I am going insane. And I'm not even busy.

Can someone please give me the secret to budgeting those 24 hours each day?

I'll bake you some cookies...when I have time...

heh...heh...

I know it's ironic, but don't judge me for posting on my blog and complaining about having no time.

Actually, if you want to judge me, go ahead. I won't waste any time worrying about it.

My Very Own Proverb

If you're a yawner...

...you're a goner.

(it's profound and you know it).

And yes, I wrote that all by myself. 

Philosophizating About La Música

I used to say that people just weren't good musicians anymore, and that none of today's music was good.In middle school, I basically only listened to the Eagles, Boston, Heart, Rush, Led Zeppelin, Journey, Styx...lots of bands like that.
Then I discovered Pandora online radio.

DA DAAA DUHN!

Now I have this Pandora station that plays basicalmente zero classic rock. But I love pretty much every song that comes on it.

I think I just wasn't listening to the right "new music". 

I still think that pretty much everything on the radio is...eh-stinky.

(If you didn't just get that Nacho Libre reference then we presumably can't be friends anymore).

But there's plenty, that sadly isn't ever granted much air time, that has relaxed style, awesome vocals, originality...lots o' that good stuff. 

Oh and harmonicas. 

And whistling.

And good lyrics...HOLLA for the songs with a catchy tune AND a good message!

And holy crenshaw, don't forget UKES! Ukulele accompaniment can almost automatically make a song my fave.

But mostly, they're just...new. Or something. I dunno. 

And it's nice to know that it doesn't cost nearly as much money to see a new artist live...just sayin'. Seriously, U2 concert ticket prices are obscene. 

Plus, younger bands probably still have all their members. 

Example time! Last year I got to see Paul McCartney live. It was amazing, wonderful, excellent, exciting, awesome, fabulous, stellar, and much more. 

But I couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to see ALL the Beatles. At the same time. WHOAH.

Did you just imagine that with me? Whew! Ah! 

And now that I've gone on a complete tangent and completely lost track of what the point is supposed to be here...

I feel like I owe you something for actually reading this. 

How about a free smile and/or hug next time I see you? Does that count?

P.S., have you picked up on the fact that I kinda like music yet? Just a little bit?
Tee hee.

Also, I wish "philosophizating" was a real word...

Dear Ability To Focus,

What happened to us?
We used to be so close.
I just want things to be the way they were.
You used to stay by my side during every homework assignment and test.
But now it's like we don't even know each other.
You only bother to approach me at the last minute, when you have nothing better to do, if ever.
And it's breaking my heart.

And possibly ruining my sleep schedule and getting me way behind in school.

Could you try just being available whenever I need you?
As in, like, sometime before 10 at night?

Anxiously unfocused and procrastinatively yours,

Aubrey

You Weren't Aware That I Am, In Fact, A Poet

...cause I'm not. Duh! That title didn't even rhyme.

Recently, a friend of mine wrote a blog post entitled "map of my heart." It was a lovely, profound, insightful, poetic piece of loveliness.
So, naturally, it inspired me.
Except, I'm not all fancy and poetic...

Map of A-Money's Heart

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Look in my heart, and you'll find some stuff about me.

I can't really tell you what you'll see

My heart's full of questions

Questions like "why am I here...

...on my computer...

...when I should be reading A Tale of Two Cities..."

My heart's full of desires

like food

and water

and to get more sleep

and to go skiing and to go skiing and to go skiing

and to be famous for my super-white-girl rapping skills

and for some guy from a renowned organization who probably wears a suit

and might be balding and has glasses to randomly say

"Hey, you won a million bucks,

because you have a really cool trucker hat".

My heart's full of memories

like when I peed my pants in 2nd grade

and when I crashed into a dumpster on my bike

and when I accidentally did a back flip off a swing

and when Abbert and I mixed up a bunch o' gross nasties together

and convinced my brother and his friends it was a delicious smoothie.

My heart's full of feelings

like "whoah, that was exciting"

and "whoah, that was cool"

and "whoah, that makes me mad"

and "whoah, that's hilarious"

and "whoah, I love this person"

and "whoah, I'm tired"

And, my heart's full of songs

that I make up on the spot

about brownies, or sometimes steak

or about school, or people

but usually about life in general.

My heart is also a vital organ that pumps blood to the other organs in my body.

This is where I make my dramatic escape. Pretend you didn't see it coming.

WHOOSH.

Warning: Do Not Read If You Hate All Things Lovely

This is solely about a song. Don't worry, it's under 3 minutes long.

This beginning of the vocals in this song literally gave me chills the first time I heard it. Talk about harmony!
Then I listened to it some more times, and went "hey, this is a good song. I like this."
Then I started thinking about the lyrics, and went "WHOAH. This is an AWESOME song."
And...it would be rude if I didn't share it with you.

Cold is the water

It freezes your already cold mind

Already cold, cold mind

And death is at your doorstep

And it will steal your innocence

But it will not steal your substance

But you are not alone in this

And you are not alone in this

As brothers we will stand and we'll hold your hand

Hold your hand

And you are the mother

The mother of your baby child

The one to whom you gave life

And you have your choices

And these are what make man great

His ladder to the stars

But you are not alone in this

And you are not alone in this

As brothers we will stand and we'll hold your hand

Hold your hand

And I will tell the night

Whisper, "Lose your sight"

But I can't move the mountains for you

So, basically:
Help is there if you want it.
But in the end, you determine your own life.
Cool message, no?