Sunday, December 16, 2012

Blind Car Handles

So I kind of cheated with the title. This post isn't really about blind car handles. It's actually about turning a blind eye and broken car handles.
But I caught your interest right?
Now you just want me to get to the point, I know, I know.
So. Here's what happened.

Once upon a time, actually a few weeks ago, it there was a very cold morning. My car door was frozen shut. It's always been sticky anyways, but frosty mornings make it quite a feat to open the door. Or in this case, nearly impossible. Why was it nearly impossible? Because about the third strong tug broke the handle clean off. Just snapped. I just stood next to my car and said,

"what?"

then I laughed. Then I got into my car through the passenger side. And I didn't fix my handle until 2 weeks later.

I stuck with the pattern of getting in through the passenger side the whole 2 weeks, knowing that I must have looked like a complete fool. Every time I got in my car at school, at home, at the store, wherever, I knew there must be somebody guffawing at how ridiculous I looked pulling all sorts of strange positions to slide over into the driver seat.

The thing is, though, I don't think anyone really noticed. I don't think I got one strange look the whole time. At least, not one that was obvious. I think when people see you going towards your car, they don't actually watch you get in. They just assume things are normal. We turn a blind eye to irregularities we don't expect to be there. Crazy. I know.

Anyway that's the story. And the lesson. And the refreshments (PSYCH NO REFRESHMENTS FOR YOU).
Okay folks that's it.
Really.
That's the end.
What more can I say about this?
Seriously, I'm done.
KBYE.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

A Different Kind of Finals Week

Finals week.
College kids talk about practically nothing else while it's going.
People say it's one of the worst things that can happen.

So, naturally, I was a little bit apprehensive going into my first one. I wasn't sure I was going to survive until Friday.
SURPRISE I'M STILL HERE!
I even finished all my tests on Thursday, yippee!

Just wanted you all to know that my first finals week wasn't exactly most triumphant, but I DID survive.

Aaaaaaand I learned a lot about what I'm going to do next time. Hooray for life and stuff.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

When You Don't Do Things That Are Dumb But You Fail To Do Things That Would Have Been Smart So You Feel The Same As You Would If You Had Done Something Dumb

They don't usually happen at the same time. But they both happen.
I, for one, mess up a lot. I have thoughts that say "heeeey there . . . you should prolly loook at thiissss before you submiiiittt your paaaaaper . . ."
And guess what? These voices are so quiet, and so creepy, and they just lurk in the back of my mind like they don't really want to make themselves known. So the part of my brain that's like "FINISH ALL THE HOMEWORKS!!!" kinda takes over. I get hasty sometimes. And then I'm embarrassed later when I realized that a small pause to make sure I was doing things correctly could have saved me a lot of pain.
Story time.
We have to write short papers for my Political Science class. At the beginning of the semester, I downloaded the list of topic options, thinking that it wouldn't change. When doing my peer reviews, I encountered another student's paper that was focused on a topic that was not included in the original list of options. I gave them a failing grade. Little did I know that the directions had been updated, and the topic this student had written about was included, and the topic I had written about was not. Did someone say, "HOLY SWINE, THAT'S FLAGNOGGING EMBARRASSING AND AWKWARD AND AWFUL"?
Well, that's actually what I said. Why didn't I just check the directions online? It would have taken 20 seconds tops.
But the point here isn't for me to lament in my silly mistakes. The point is to share a valuable lesson with all my peeps. The lesson is this: don't get so carried away with life that you don't take the time to do little things that will actually save you time in the future even though you probably think you don't have time but you're rushing so much that you don't even take the time to think about whether you have time to do them.
You follow?
Good.

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Narwhals, Yo

I discovered last night that narwhals are real. So that's chill.
I feel like an idiot for not already knowing that, but I'm also ridiculously excited.
NARWHALS YES.
Here's a video about them. It's by National Geographic. That's how I know it's legit.
Ohmygoodness I still can't believe narwhals are real.



Okay I'ma tell you the story. This is a discovery of gargantuan importance in my life, and I need to document it for my posterity. It's probably not journal-worthy, so you internet people get to hear it.

So mah roomie, Camille, and I were continuing an age-old American tradition of watching Elf instead of studying for finals. You know the part where a narwhal just comes out of the water and errbody's scared out o' their wits, except then he's just like "Bye Buddy, hope you find your dad" and Buddy's like "Thanks Mr. Narwhal" and it's all great and you're like "I WISH NARWHALS WERE REAL SO THEY COULD GIVE ME ENCOURAGING ADVICE BEFORE I EMBARK ON MAGICAL LIFE-CHANGING JOURNEYS" and then Camille's like "Narwhals are real" and I'm like "YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME NO THEY AREN'T YOU LIAR YOU'RE TRYING TO GET MY HOPES UP SO YOU CAN THROW ME DOWN TO THE GROUND AND LAUGH AT ME AND TELL ME THAT GULLIBLE IS WRITTEN ON THE CEILING ALSO AND NOW I WILL TAKE CAPS LOCK OFF" and Camille's like "No, seriously, look at this totally legit NatGeo video on the interwebs!" and you're just like
"My life.
is changed.
forever."
Narwhals, yo. They'll change your life.
Who wants to go with me to see them in the wild? Okay. Sweet.